Real Stories: A Personal Essay of a College Student With TS

 

"My Personal Essay"
By: Rafael Francisco Zamora Bunye (a college student diagnosed with TS)

I've had quite a number of experiences that helped to define me as a person. Though they are not that many, I believe that those experiences helped shape the person that I am today. But in all of those, one sticks out the most. This is the main topic of my paper.

I have Tics. I have had it as a child but didn’t really understand what it was until I found that that unusual thing was called to be Tourette’s Syndrome. To those who may not know what it is, Tourette’s Syndrome, as defined by science, is a hereditary, neuropsychiatric disorder characterized by multiple physical tics and at least one vocal tic. It is also called Tics for short. In layman’s term, it is a disorder that is inherited from the parents which causes the body or some specific body parts to jerk otherwise make some sounds uncontrollably. With it being hereditary, I inherited my Tics from my father who inherited his Tics from his father and so on. When a person has Tourette’s, it is hard for him to control his reflexes and since I also have it, you might see my arms, legs or even my whole body jerking a lot. I would also make some sounds, which too is uncontrollable.

Having Tics would make it hard for me to somewhat socialize since people would always ask me why I’m jerking a lot or making certain sounds. Back when I was new to the whole Tourette’s, I didn’t know how to explain it so I would make excuses like I’m itching or I’m just stretching. It is also hard for me since people would have the tendency to stare at me while my Tics were acting up or sometimes even make fun of me and mock me. Those things would greatly affect my self – esteem because it made me feel unaccepted and it makes me think that there’s something wrong with me. It would again be hard for me because I have a difficult time in doing some things like the ROTC in school, driving and just plain keeping still. With those being the case, it’s hard for a person with Tourette’s like me to have a high self – esteem.

But even if those happen to me, it doesn’t stop me from doing things I love. Knowing that I can’t control what people thought of me, the best thing I did was to control what I thought of myself. I always tell myself that I am normal like every body else but unique in my own way. I keep on thinking that my Tics are an advantage rather than a disorder. It is an advantage because it acts like my trainer in building my self - confidence. I get help from my family and friends who always support me in everything I do. They are the ones who remind me to relax when my Tics are acting up and tell me that I can do anything despite my condition. I also get help from watching inspirational videos about Tourette’s and reading books about keeping a high self – esteem. I certainly love the quote of movie that said, “I have Tourette’s but Tourette’s doesn’t have me.” I always keep that quote in mind whenever I feel down about my Tics because it lifts up my spirit to continue to strive harder and attain my goals in life. And whenever someone tries to make fun of my Tics, I would just laugh along with them because I’m not insecure about it anymore and I’ve accepted it. I would sort of find it funny too. Whenever someone asks me about my Tourette’s, I wouldn’t make excuses about it but instead, openly talk about it and explain it to them.

I would like to achieve my goals about Tourette’s someday. First of all, I’d like to be a spokesperson about Tourette’s and inspire a lot of people who have it to do what they love and not be stopped by their Tics. I would also like to help people become more aware of Tourette’s Syndrome and the impact on the lives of people who have it. I would like to help children and teenagers cope with their Tics and to have a high self – esteem so they won’t be ashamed of their Tourette’s. Lastly, I would like to inspire and show people that having a disability is not a weakness or disadvantage and it is not a roadblock in living a happy life and fulfilling your dreams.

Having all these said and done, I could say that having Tourette’s Syndrome and how I chose to deal with it is a very significant experience for me that helped define myself as a person. It helped define me for it has contributed in my high self – esteem. When I chose to deal with it in a positive manner, it helped me make a lot of friends and meet new people. It has given me the confidence to join a lot of activities in my village and in school. It taught me how to face my other problems. It taught me that there is good in even the most difficult of times. It showed me not to be ashamed of who I really am and to just be myself. As what Brian Tracy, a self help author, once said, “ You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.”